New Faces, Old Places

A long, long time ago, when the likes of Johnny Unitas and Chuck Bednarik were tearing up the football leagues, before players argued over gargantuan amounts of money, players were playing for the love of the game and got whatever money they could round up along the way. When instead of vacationing to Hawaii, the stars of the NFL went to work in the off season. So in remembrance of the way the good old football league used to be, I decided to see what offseason jobs the current NFL players would have.

Politician: Peyton Manning,Quarterback, Indianapolis Colts

Coming into this season, I would have gone with Tiki Barber, but after his decision to publicly announce his retirement and consequently provide a major distraction to a playoff caliber team. Therefore, my choice is Peyton Manning. He has all the intangibles that are required of a politician. He is the leader of arguably the best team over this half decade. He displays his intelligence and ability to adapt, by being the best pre-snap adjuster in the league. Like many politicians, they have a great pedigree. Pedigree is Manning’s middle name, they are football royalty. Peyton’s father, Archie, played 13 years in the NFL, while Peyton’s brother, Eli, is currently the starting quarterback for the New York Giants and, like Peyton, was a number one overall draft selection. The Manning’s are the NFL equivalent of the Bush’s in politics, with the former president of the United States, George H.W. Bush, being the political equal Archie, with our current president George W. Bush being the parallel of Peyton and Eli being the correspondent for Jeb Bush, governor of Florida.

Lawyer: Chad Johnson aka "Ocho Cinco", Wide Reciever, Cincinatti Bengals
Chad is the epitome of a litigator. He argues, outperforms, and destroys the credibility of the opposition better than anyone in the NFL. Luckily for Chad, litigation is a job in which intelligence is not required. Which happens to be an area in which Chad does not excel in. Chad dominates the arguing department and brings a new level to the art of trash talking. Chad is in the upper echelon of celebrators, often disgracing the defensive back that he just burned on that touchdown reception. If Chad was a lawyer, he would start off by arguing his Spanish speaking tail off, and proceed to ruin the defense lawyer’s credibility. Once winning the case, He would celebrate his victory the entire way home. The United States judiciary system could use more lawyers like "Ocho-Cinco".

Trash Man: Drew Brees, Quarterback, New Orleans Saints
He’s under appreciated and collects more trash than anyone in the NFL. Going into last offseason, San Diego Charger GM A.J. Smith had to decide whether to keep 2 time pro bowl quarterback, Brees, or unproven, first round pick, Phillip Rivers. Smith let Brees walk and kept Rivers. Now Brees is leading the league in passing yards and has led the, bottom feeders, which are the New Orleans Saints to the verge of the playoffs. He collects his trash in the form of fourth quarter passing wards, a stat in which he leads the league in. He has a 112.7 quarterback rating in the fourth quarter and averages 91 yards per game in the fourth quarter in many blow out the saint’s blow out wins. With the amount of garbage time production that brees’ collects, and his trash man-like lack of appreciation he receives, that’s why he’s my choice for Trash Man of the NFL.

Police Officer: Walter Jones, Offensive Tackle, Seattle Seahawks
The role of Jones, who is a NFL left tackle, is primarily to protect his quarterback. The role of a police officer is to, "Protect and Serve", that motto is what Walter lives by. He protects his quarterback, Matt Hasselback, just as good as any tackle in the league, and he "serves" opposing defenders better than most. He paved the way for Shaun Alexander’s record breaking year along with Shaun’s MVP. Te massive Jones is known to have pushed his Cadillac Escalade for his Offseason workout to improve his strength.

Many of the former great football players paid their dues on and off the field, and rightly deserve all the credit for all the hard work that they put in. Athletes today are too selfish and self-absorbed in money and fame. So while the Terrell Owens’s of the world are griping over 25 million crispy chicken nuggets or 26 million chocolate frosties, just remember how 50 years ago, guys played for the love of the game.