New Faces, Old Places

A long, long time ago, when the likes of Johnny Unitas and Chuck Bednarik were tearing up the football leagues, before players argued over gargantuan amounts of money, players were playing for the love of the game and got whatever money they could round up along the way. When instead of vacationing to Hawaii, the stars of the NFL went to work in the off season. So in remembrance of the way the good old football league used to be, I decided to see what offseason jobs the current NFL players would have.

Politician: Peyton Manning,Quarterback, Indianapolis Colts

Coming into this season, I would have gone with Tiki Barber, but after his decision to publicly announce his retirement and consequently provide a major distraction to a playoff caliber team. Therefore, my choice is Peyton Manning. He has all the intangibles that are required of a politician. He is the leader of arguably the best team over this half decade. He displays his intelligence and ability to adapt, by being the best pre-snap adjuster in the league. Like many politicians, they have a great pedigree. Pedigree is Manning’s middle name, they are football royalty. Peyton’s father, Archie, played 13 years in the NFL, while Peyton’s brother, Eli, is currently the starting quarterback for the New York Giants and, like Peyton, was a number one overall draft selection. The Manning’s are the NFL equivalent of the Bush’s in politics, with the former president of the United States, George H.W. Bush, being the political equal Archie, with our current president George W. Bush being the parallel of Peyton and Eli being the correspondent for Jeb Bush, governor of Florida.

Lawyer: Chad Johnson aka "Ocho Cinco", Wide Reciever, Cincinatti Bengals
Chad is the epitome of a litigator. He argues, outperforms, and destroys the credibility of the opposition better than anyone in the NFL. Luckily for Chad, litigation is a job in which intelligence is not required. Which happens to be an area in which Chad does not excel in. Chad dominates the arguing department and brings a new level to the art of trash talking. Chad is in the upper echelon of celebrators, often disgracing the defensive back that he just burned on that touchdown reception. If Chad was a lawyer, he would start off by arguing his Spanish speaking tail off, and proceed to ruin the defense lawyer’s credibility. Once winning the case, He would celebrate his victory the entire way home. The United States judiciary system could use more lawyers like "Ocho-Cinco".

Trash Man: Drew Brees, Quarterback, New Orleans Saints
He’s under appreciated and collects more trash than anyone in the NFL. Going into last offseason, San Diego Charger GM A.J. Smith had to decide whether to keep 2 time pro bowl quarterback, Brees, or unproven, first round pick, Phillip Rivers. Smith let Brees walk and kept Rivers. Now Brees is leading the league in passing yards and has led the, bottom feeders, which are the New Orleans Saints to the verge of the playoffs. He collects his trash in the form of fourth quarter passing wards, a stat in which he leads the league in. He has a 112.7 quarterback rating in the fourth quarter and averages 91 yards per game in the fourth quarter in many blow out the saint’s blow out wins. With the amount of garbage time production that brees’ collects, and his trash man-like lack of appreciation he receives, that’s why he’s my choice for Trash Man of the NFL.

Police Officer: Walter Jones, Offensive Tackle, Seattle Seahawks
The role of Jones, who is a NFL left tackle, is primarily to protect his quarterback. The role of a police officer is to, "Protect and Serve", that motto is what Walter lives by. He protects his quarterback, Matt Hasselback, just as good as any tackle in the league, and he "serves" opposing defenders better than most. He paved the way for Shaun Alexander’s record breaking year along with Shaun’s MVP. Te massive Jones is known to have pushed his Cadillac Escalade for his Offseason workout to improve his strength.

Many of the former great football players paid their dues on and off the field, and rightly deserve all the credit for all the hard work that they put in. Athletes today are too selfish and self-absorbed in money and fame. So while the Terrell Owens’s of the world are griping over 25 million crispy chicken nuggets or 26 million chocolate frosties, just remember how 50 years ago, guys played for the love of the game.

American chicks dig the long ball; European chicks dig championships

For years, the United States of America has always been at the forefront of international competition. Whether it was Carl Lewis sprinting, Michelle Kwan skating, or Michael Jordan shooting free throws, a podium finish was always a guarantee.

The sport of basketball has always been the epitome of American dominance. Everyone remembers the "Dream Team", the 1992 Olympic Champions, which was quickly dubbed as the most talented collaboration of basketball talent of all time.

15 years later, times have changed. USA basketball finished 6th in the 2003 World Basketball Championships. They had three losses, more than all of the previous Olympic teams combined. This year, the American basketball team lost to a Greek National team that did not have a single player from the National Basketball Association (NBA). Greece was not even present in the 1992 Barcelona Games!
The same trend is spreading toward what was once "America’s Pastime". In this summer’s World Baseball Classic, the United States shipped off their baseball version of the "Dream Team." Unfortunately, after losses to Canada, Mexico and Korea, they were eliminated and failed to make it past the second round of the tournament.

The most likely explanation for this decline, aside from the rest of the world catching up and breeding their own talent, is the fact that American athletes are becoming more selfish because they concentrate on only themselves. The rest of the world has yet to fall into the trap of American superstars as they are still playing for the love of the game and for their country. Athletes in the United States have been engulfed by a culture littered with highlights of homeruns, ice-cracking fights, slam-dunks, and helmet-jarring football tackles.
This year, Adidas, a German based company, has launched an ad campaign to rival that of the American shoe giant Nike. Nike’s ad campaign for as long as basketball shoes were a coveted entity was based around an individual player. Most notably this player was Michael Jordan and his Air Jordan line of sneakers; now Lebron "King" James’s shoe line which has now made the Beaverton, Oregon company a basketball shoe giant who currently sells over 80 percent of basketball shoes is the focus.

After signing an 11 year deal with the NBA to be its official sponsor, Adidas will now use a marketing strategy that will be based on the concept of a team to lure in its basketball consumers. Their campaign is based on the concept of team basketball; their slogan is "It Takes 5IVE" and they ultimately hope to become the dominant shoemaker for basketball. The German-based company’s campaign is symbolic to how Germany and the rest of the international world are slowly catching up to America and its symbolic company, Nike.
So while American’s are waiting for the next And One mix tape to "drop", or juicing up on steroids so they can be that monster homerun hitter, international athletes are working on that mid-range jumper, learning how to field the infield groundball, or making the perfect cross ice pass.

So my fellow Americans, even if chicks do dig the long ball, the rest of the world will soon surpass us, and as the great Babe Ruth said, "The way a team plays as a whole determines its success. You may have the greatest bunch of individual stars in the world, but if they don't play together, the club won’t be worth a dime."